Аттрибуты настоящего защитника Родинки
Галерея Истории Органы Форум Об авторе


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  • My Spartacus 
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    В НАЧАЛО




  • My Spartacus II

    экзотика 1. Sofia and sea coast in Bulgaria

    I was in Bulgaria a few times but my first visit there was after some interval in my trips abroad connected with forbidding for me to work at the international exhibitions or to make the trips abroad for six years after the events with English teacher from Italy. I tried to form and prepare the proper documents for trips a few times, but finally I received always the negative answers (not from the secret service of course, but from Communist organizations).

    Finally there was a reason to interrupt this exclusive circle. We fulfilled the contract with Bulgaria on our two-phase flow investigations, where I was one of the responsible executors in a part concerning my jet pumps. I couldn't go to Bulgaria during a time of contract's fulfillment, but it was a necessary to discuss the final results and to make the general conclusions, and I was permitted to go there for these discussions and summing up the work, for which I made all contract documentation. I went by air in Sofia with a group of my colleagues, while the leader of our group was my scientific supervisor Ivan Timofeyevich.

    We flew in Sofia and lived in the large modern hotel near the local market that wondered me with an abundance of early vegetables and strawberries. We had then in Russia many such things from Bulgaria and anyway the local choice was tremendous. I lived in the first time in such huge and modern hotel, and even the free breakfast with Swedish table wondered me.

    We had the successful and friendly discussions, and in the same time our Bulgarian friends tried to show us all interesting places of their capital. Sofia has many nice places connected with fighting against Turkish yoke and the help of Russian army in 19th century. There are also many Orthodox Church cathedrals, among which Alexander Nevsky church is especially beautiful, large and hospital for Russians. The icons, paintings and all the decoration of this cathedral are really impressive. We visited also the large active man's Rilsky monastery in mountains, where in the large convenient room for monks I thought, how they decided their sexual problems. But frankly it was really very spiritual and beautiful place existing for centuries. It was so that as in our Russia during tatar-mongol yoke the Bulgarian people manage to keep their language, culture and customs only due to their conversation in monasteries during the long years of Turkish yoke.

    My colleagues wanted me to be with them any free time in Sofia, while I wanted to be at least sometimes alone. In the late and night time the sounds of music from the restaurants downstairs reminded me that the gay life could exist here too. Of course I was true. They had so many gays in Bulgaria both from Bulgarian and Turkish side. I found one of the Central Park or boulevard with underground toilet. Another one was near the former mausoleum of their known communist G.Dimitrov, who was connected with the fire in Reistag. I met in both places some nice people. The Turkish (by nationality) gays with black hairs were especially nice, kind and soft, probably because they were in Bulgaria as the people of the second sort (as the Jews in Russia or the black people in States before). Anyway all of them had the good working places, while their figures and cocks were so nice, slim and straight. But if to be really frank, the gays of both nationalities had no great differences in their sexual affairs and physical data (the cocks in Bulgaria are extremely good).

    Once not so far from the hotel I met the extremely handsome guy who was so kind with me and had a very European cloth. He was gypsy and we had the full mutual understanding and the time together. I remembered my experience with a young gypsy in Moscow, when the boy no more than 17-18 years old was very strong, active and nice in sex. But he wanted me to be only passive. With the gypsy guy in Sofia I had all types of sex. There are many gypsies in Bulgaria and Romania, and I found many gays among them. The experience of my first visit helped me greatly in my other visits to Bulgaria.

    The next trip was connected with visiting Bulgaria with a group of representatives from all former Soviet Republics. These people were responsible in local organizations of friendship (we had before such things) for working with foreign countries. I think that these organizations were the typically Soviet structure and probably were connected with secret service. Anyway all these people of 15 different nationalities were extremely kind, intelligent and friendly. Two ladies from my institute and I were awarded to be in this group and trip for "the good activity in GDR-USSR society".

    The trip was begun in Sofia, where I visited again my favorite gay places known to me after the first visit. Anytime the gays advised me to visit the Turkish bath but due to intensive program and visiting many organizations and enterprises I couldn't do it. I remember that at some enterprises we were astonished to papers with the data about people, who worked here before and died. These papers were hung everywhere. I liked that the people here didn't want to forget their died friends and colleagues.

    Once at the factory sewing women's underwear for Western countries they showed us their last collection. The things were practically transparent and the girls showing us this underwear were for us practically nude. In that time it seemed as the impossible event: the girls were really beautiful, good and attractive. I thought seeing on them, why nobody yet hadn't imagine to do such shows with men. My love to the nude men's bodies is extraordinary.

    The Helen from our work had in Sofia her cousin. I rang him up, and he met Lydia Anatoliyevna, Ljuda and me. He was with his son of 15 years old. They took us in mountain Vitosha, which is over Sofia. On the way we visited the nice nun monastery located highly over city. On the top of Vitosha we found much snow, though it was already the end of May, and many accommodations for skiing. The son of Helen's brother had to be operated in hospital. He had a tight skin on his cock that limited the possibility of sexual acts, and they discussed it with me openly. I was a little wondered: never before I met such thing, though I knew that the Jews and Moslems dismissed this skin and practically all American guys and gays are also circumcised. Iliya (the name of cousin) was very polite and attentive with us. But our time with him and his nice and not circumcised yet son was very limited.

    Due to a special status of this group we lived in the best hotels and had the excellent program. We visited many cities and the Gold Sands resort. Many foreigners (mainly Germans) visit Black Sea coast of Bulgaria. The tourists from Eastern and Western countries had on Gold Sand the different beaches. The Western beach was equipped with the special weave cabins. But the entrance fee and cost of all services were very expansive and impossible for us.

    But just at this beach there was a special place surrounding by a high stone fence, where the gays from the total Europe had their cozy place. I visited it once and then it became my dream to come there again and again. And it was possible to come there for visiting the toilets from our "second hand" place, because it was simultaneously a toilet of the total beach. Near the cabins there was on a small territory the sandy place for the gays of Europe and the world.

    In the morning my two ladies Lydia Anatoliyevna and Ljuda liked to come with me at beach for the morning swimming and exercises. But I forget to tell that before visiting Varna and Golden Sands we were in city Gabrovo. The Bulgarian City Gabrovo is known due to the humor of local citizens, the numerous anecdotes, and the different museums. One of them showed the local crafts during the centuries; the second one was devoted to the history of humor, laugh and corresponding festivals in Gabrovo.

    We came in this second museum very late and anyway we were permitted to come and to see the so interesting exposition. We were alone in museum and it saved me. I walked from one place to another and laughed endlessly up to tears looking at pictures, photos and other exhibits. Our time was limited and I was in hurry, because I wanted to see everything in the museum, which was quite well known in Russia. I didn't notice the glass window that was near the floor; I fell on glass and broke it. In the same time I cut my hand and the blood began to flow as the water from a tap hydrant. I didn't know what to do. At least I managed to collect the glass and put it carefully at the place as if nothing happened. I was afraid that it should be necessary to pay for glass and such thick glass had to be expensive.

    Some people from my group noticed the blood flowing as a stream from my hand. One nice and pleasant Georgian lady, which reminded me my dear Natela from Tbilisi, broke her clean and white neckerchief into parts and bandaged my hand. I repeat that the people of different nationalities were so friendly and kind in this group, and never before I had such relations and support. All of them showed the care and attention to me after this accident. But they were so friendly in general and in other cases too. In such way we came to the coast.

    The leader of our group was very "serious" and all the time had a special attention to me that was "connected" not with my health. In restaurants my ladies and me preferred to occupy the separate table usually located in center of hall near the people from other "Western" world. I was happy to see many gays among them, which I recognized at once: the intuition of our people is tremendous. When I visited the beach in mornings with my ladies, I made always the morning run along the total beach ("communist" and "capitalistic" parts), and in that time our leader tried to follow or to run after me any time. My ladies died of laugh. He was older and not so thin, and it was funny to see how this fat man was running after me. Of course I could run off but there was no reason for doing it.

    By regret because of pointed reasons with hand I couldn't swim a couple of days of our being at Gold Sands. When I began to swim, it was a great event for the total group. Some of these so friendly people, for example, a young man from Fergana, I met later on in our country. It was really pity to know next year that our "leader" drowned in the fountain of Yugoslavian City Zagreb, because he was strongly drunk. He liked to drink and probably it was connected with his "special" work.

    In Bulgaria I managed to visit easily the gay place of Gold Sands' long beach. There I met many nice people from Germany, Austria and other European countries. We were really open, friendly and merry, and they liked me, especially because I was the first Russian gay for them and from the Soviet Union. Now our Russian gays flooded the world, but 10-15 years ago nobody in Europe knew about us at all. I've received at our small gay place of beach on Gold Sands much interesting information from them, the anecdotes and the facts about gay community in Europe and the world. Some gays were there even from the USA. I liked that the most of them were so open in everything. For example, they openly visited the cabins for sex and one thin feminine boy from Vienna served all of them as a partner: he was full of love and sucked the cocks endlessly. Finally he invited me too to go with him in cabin but I preferred to lay on sand and to discuss the gay problems with a quite not young man from Germany and the bronzed gentleman from States, which traveled from one resort with gay places to another and was full of different and interesting for me impressions.

    Due to these good meetings and impressions I didn't notice how the time at Gold Sands was over. My main impressions were connected with the quite intensive gay activity and a large number of gays in Bulgaria. Therefore I tried to come in this country once more and received such possibility at next year, when I was in the tourists group, which visited two countries - Romania and Bulgaria. Though the first country was Romania, I begin again from Bulgaria, where we came from Romanian City Constanza.

    This time I was at Albena - another Black Sea resort of Bulgaria. The visits to gay places and meetings with gays were not the last goals of this trip, and in Albena I found at once the nudists place, where in the end (as in Dubrovnik) there was a place for gays. But as soon as I found it, the weather became cold and not for the beach. Only when I managed again to visit the Gold Sands near Varna, where at the same gay place of beach I met some my friends of last year - a sucking boy from Vienna and the tall not young gentleman from Germany, I received some satisfaction. It was so nice for me to hug once more these old friends, and I felt, how great and nice was our gay community and brotherhood (or sisterhood).

    Our trip with the new group repeated mainly the same places: the excellent old cities Velikotirnovo and Plovdiv, the valley of roses (I liked the jam of rose-petals) and the places connected with the war of Russia with Turkey in XIX century. The place Ship with more than thousand steps up to the top of mountain was really excellent, and I repeated this way once more, though I was there a year before. To be just, we managed to visit much more places during visiting Bulgaria with the first "special" group. Finally we came with the second group again in Sofia, and I visited here all the gay places and finally the Turkish bath in the center of the city. One lady on our group was before a known singer of diva of Bolshoi Theater - Galina Zvesdina. She told me with conviction that the gays used the excellent place in the garden near Bolshoi for themselves and their matters. My reaction was so that instead of conducting her in city I found at once the underground toilet, where I met the tall Bulgarian gay with glasses and really "bolshoi" (great) prick. We made together many actions for a long time until I felt the full "revenge" for her offensive words.

    And finally I managed to visit the Turkish bath in the real center of Sofia. There I had my first experience of open group sex after my "games" with dacha's friends in childhood. But I shall begin from the beginning. The majority of visitors consisted of the very young Turkish boys (of 12-15 years old). Of course the conditions were excellent: there were many separate huge rooms, where you could find a boy and the place for "doing everything".

    The boys noticed how attentively and with special interest I looked at their actions with not so young Turkish man: they fucked him simultaneously in all possible holes and he liked it. He invited me to join them. But when the boys understood at once my desires, the oldest of them came to me (he was the most active with a passive man) and asked me to turn my face and stomack to the wall. He was not so tall as I was, but anyway he managed to insert quickly his so long narrow cock in my ass. He began to make the onward movements with such feeling and intensity that in this moment I understood: the size of prick could be not so important as the manner of acting. In the beginning he drove off the young boys, who wanted to join us and to substitute him in his furious actions. But finally he felt that I had nothing against it, and he permitted them to substitute him for some time.

    They made this substitution very softly and gently. But when they penetrated me, there were no obstacles for the "flight" on the "seventh sky". And again I felt that not the size of cocks, while the force and frequency of actions played role. I was only afraid that it could be over. The boys were clever and kind and also wanted to continue this process of full group junction or confluence as long as possible.

    The passive man looked at us with the delight and envy. He advised me to suck simultaneously the cocks of free boys. The first one in this action was the oldest guy. I sucked his trunk with a pleasure, because before it his rod "cleaned" my rectum so carefully. Then other boys substituted him and managed to put in my mouth not only two but three cocks simultaneously, and I sucked and licked them. We made everything in standing positions and they had to use the bench for reaching my mouth (they stood on this bench). The oldest guy finally ejaculated the spray in my ass hole, and I felt appreciably and with pleasure the pressure of this injected jet inside my stomach. In the same time another boys took their shots or poured out their warm and sweat sperm on all my body beginning from the face and finishing with stomach and legs. I trembled from the extreme excitation, and due to the masturbation, which all the boys tried to do with my cock, I ejaculated practically in the same time as all these five or six boys. After it all of us went to showers and I stood under the water spray as a perfectly new and happy man.

    It was strange that in 5-7 minutes my cock was erected again. And I noticed that my six boys were in the same situation. They invited me to repeat the joint playing. Anyway I preferred to be with the passive Turkish man. I fucked him in ass hole with the same rage as the oldest boy made it with me. In the same time the boy with extremely beautiful face and figure managed to put again his infinite prick in my hole. Never before I had such excitement and happiness from sex. The simultaneous actions from both sides and a final act were made with the total pressing of our three bodies and full penetration. We couldn't be separated for some time, because the great feeling of pleasure and satisfaction paralyzed us.

    Finally I had to leave this place and bath, as the airplane had to take the group (the group of tourists but by regret not the group of so open, sexy and nice Turkish boys) soon in Moscow. Due to these Turkish boys I realized my long-term wishes and dreams, which I had since the time of group mutual sucking in our underground cave that my young boy friends and I dug out at the dacha place in Udelnaya. The age of these Turkish boys was the same as the age of my dacha friends, and only I was now not so young. So, in addition, these active and smart Turkish boys allowed me to feel myself by many years younger.

    2. Romania as the country of Romans and gypsies; Slavonic Dubrovnik

    We came in Bucharest by train from Moscow still in Chaushescu times. Though both our countries were friendly, the customer control was very strict. Our tourist group was distributed in a very nice hotel. Recently the city suffered greatly from the strong earthquake. Anyway it was clean and the guide showed us the multistory building that in spite of large amplitude of oscillations during the event was still in a good state. The city was green, gray and dull and the general spirit was suppressed.

    They showed us a collection of "presents" to their Comrade Chaushescu and it killed me: in Russia we had such things (the presents of Comrade Stalin) more than 30 years ago. The most people in my group had the same feeling as I had. Once we had seen the car with this Chaushescu, which crossed the center of city under special careful escort.

    Of course I found very quickly the toilets in central part of city, i.e. not so far from our hotel, and there were many gays in them. I was very astonished of two main and different types of people there. The men with blue eyes and slim figures presented one type, and I was said that they were the descendants of Roman warriors reached the coast of Black Sea. Another type of people reminded me the gypsies and had the black hairs and perfectly other faces than Roman people. Both types of gays were so open and frank downstairs in underground toilets, but when they went out on surface, their behavior became different or neutral. And they didn't speak mainly any foreign languages. Everything reminded me our Soviet times.

    Anyway one nice and not so tall local man decided to visit me in my hotel. We came in building and they permitted us to pick up on the floor with my room. But the system of information worked well. Some men appeared on the floor and it was impossible to enter the room. I couldn't even to say good-buy to this gay. The situation was a little similar to the case that I had in Yerevan with a dancer from Armenian ballet group.

    After Bucharest we visited a city Brashov in mountains, where before many German people lived. The city was quite different from Bucharest in architecture, and we lived not in city but in the excellent sportive center with swimming pool and other accommodations. But the really good swimming was at the Black Sea coast, where we came after crossing the country and the new channel connecting Danube with Black Sea on the Romanian territory. I didn't find at the Romanian coast any special gay places as in Bulgaria though the city Constantsa was hospital and picturesque as all resort cities. My dream became the return in Bulgaria, where I met many gay places, and what was more important, many nice gays. But I described these meetings in the beginning of this section.

    My trip in Yugoslavia took place soon after my travel in Romania and Bulgaria. I wrote already about the nudists island and my time in city Dubrovnik located on the coast of Adriatic Sea. Though it is Slavonic City there were many Albanian Moslem people there and the local Slavonic people had the black hairs and very not Slavonic appearance. But the city surrounded by high walls, along which all tourists and I with friends walked, was an independent republic in the former times and had the extremely beautiful architecture. I found the toilet at one of so narrow streets of city and the quite many guys looking there for sexual partner and events. I was so astonished to find such choice in such small city, but then at beach the gays explained me that I came in the proper sexual time and that the gays had in general a peak of their sexuality just at 4-5 o'clock PM and 10-11 AM. Frankly I didn't believe it, but when I was in other parts of the world and had a possibility to examine it, I began also to believe in these periods of day gay sexual activity. Of course it takes place in addition to the nonstop evening and night activity.

    A region of Dubrovnik with the hotel, where the conference took place and all its participants lived, was far from the central part with surrounding wall. Another part of city was similar to our resort on Black Sea coast or to the Greek cities as I imagined them due to the pictures, photos and films. The water in Adriatic Sea was extremely clean, and it was possible to see the large colorful fishes swimming in water. The swimming in water for me was really marvelous and I felt it especially at the island with nudists beach. Before it I visited with excursion some hospital and picturesque islands at the Adriatic Sea, where we came by ship. My time was a little spoilt, because I had the tight sandalwoods and got soon the corns at the heels of both legs and couldn't walk: every step became a torture for me. Two German tourists noticed it and suggested me a very good plaster, which solved at once all my problems. I thought, how important, useful and great could be the international assistance and cooperation (here it is a time to say: "Shut up!")

    I came to the nudists island in accordance with the kind advice and support of one Yugoslavian lady from our conference. Before going there I visited the museum of birds, which was located also at the same island. Everything that I've seen at the nudists beach was in such contrast with museum's exhibits. And anyway I found some similarity. At least many people and in particular gay were sitting at the beach in the separate natural stone cabin, which I called as the nest for our gay people. The first part of nudists beach was full with many ladies with so different breasts and vaginas.

    But my impressions were especially bright from the second gay part of the island. I liked especially the independent and friendly behavior of gays from the total world. Do you remember my question: "Why did they go upstairs?" When I've seen there the intensive fucking and sucking without any limitations, I was so excited and astonished that my erection was up to the pain in penis. But as you remember, I cut it by a thorn of shrubs, when I moved there without stopping and watched for the different realizations of my inner sexual desires, which were opened before me in the different places in the nests between shrub branches. I suffered due to it and didn't know what to do. The modest librarian from London managed at once to stop the blood flow by his tongue and gentle licking.

    I couldn't find then the proper thankful words to him, when we came back from island to city by ship. But just he gave me a present, and I keep carefully at home this detective book about gays. I remember also the very nice and slim Dutch guy at beach with so thick and huge prick and the American tourist traveling along the world with his things in one huge container. Once, when I was much bolder and began to speak to the people from our international community on the hill elevating over our gay beach, one nice and very sexy American mulatto told me:

    "Why did you shoot down the Southern Korean Plane over Kamchatka?"

    I was at Kamchatka just a couple months before it but I didn't want to discuss this problem in this place and in this time.

    "Give me a possibility to feel free at least once a life!" - told I him with an intonation interrupting any discussion and all other gays of different nationalities supported me. If to be frank, I had such strong desire not to speak but to do something special and sexual from our gay "menu" with this mulatto.

    As ever, my time for beach was very limited, because it was possible to reach the nudists beach only by ship, which did it with large intervals, and in the same time I was very busy at conference. Finally my general time in Dubrovnik was so limited. I want only to add that I came in Dubrovnik soon after returning from my first business trip to Kamchatka. It was so wonderful to cross the half of the Earth in such short time. Remembering the stories of American gay tourist at the beach of Bulgarian Gold Sands I felt myself also as a man of the World. I understood also the benefits and advantages from my English knowledge and anytime I thanked my English teacher Michael Semenovich, who studied me to speak fluent English.

    3. Trip by car in Germany through Czechoslovakia and Poland

    Once my family and I decided to go in Germany to our friend by car through Ukraine and Czechoslovakia. Our fist stop was in Shostka in the hospital house of my Ukraine friend Volodya and his family. Then we have first seen his small twins. All of us were happy of meeting, because their family have seen also first my daughter and wife. The mother of Natasha (Volodya's wife) was a cook and she tried to prepare for us the best dishes of really good Ukraine kitchen. Volodya decided to take us by car at the river for fishing. Frankly I never made it before in my life. I was happy, because the fish pecked well. I ran from one place to another and was finally tired. I decided to lie on the open ground. It was still a May, and the ground was not heated yet. In evening in Volodya's house I had a very high temperature and our entire trip was under question.

    The mother of Natasha Vera Vasilijevna put the vodka compress on my breast and I slept with it. Next morning I was quite well and we could continue our trip. We thanked out hosts for their friendship, support and help and went through the total Ukraine to its western border. On the way we had some stops for resting in the marvelous pine tree forests. My impression of Ukraine and the road was quite positive.

    We managed quickly to reach Kiev, to see there the most interesting places and in the same day to be at the border with Slovakia. We crossed it not so far from Uzhgorod, about which I kept my best impressions. The road in Slovakia was even better, and it was not so many another cars in the border area. The time was leading to evening and we found our first camping abroad not so far from city Koshice. It was an open place behind a small restaurant. It was raining and we put our tent on the wet ground, changed our clothes and went to restaurant. I asked Irina to take her bag with money and our documents with us.

    The atmosphere in snack bar was excellent and Irina hung her bag on the back of chair. The prices were very low and the service was good. The local guys were extremely attentive (if not to say more) to our daughter. We were a little shocked with this nice atmosphere. After payment for food, beer and wine we stayed for some time in restaurant. In addition the waiter had the appearance (a face and a figure with something huge between legs behind trousers) of real Hollywood star. When we left Irina forget about her bag. We came in our tent and were so tired that lied at once and slept at our partially wet beds robed of our strength.

    Early in morning we decided to continue our way, and when we collected in the car all our things, Irina discovered that her bag disappeared. I advised her to go at the restaurant. She didn't find the bag at the place, where she hung it. But when she asked the waiter about it, he returned it to her at once with jokes regarding our forgetfulness. We were happy and wondered, because there was a large sum of money there and all our documents. It was the mention and reason for us to be attentive and careful, anyway later on in Prague we (finally it was I in the second case) have done the similar thing.

    In Koshice we decided to remark the happy end of accident in the same snack bar and decided to have there the breakfast. Frankly we didn't want to leave the so nice people in this place, which showed us the real hospitality, kindness and honesty. But just there our mood was spoilt by the epilepsy attack of one woman. And anyway though the atmosphere in other tents in Bratislava and near Brno was also friendly, we couldn't forget the nice time at the first our camping. The people in Europe like to travel and use the camping and in that time there were not many Russian tourists on cars. Therefore all the people were so kind to us and asked us about everything: many of them had never before seen or spoke to the Russian people. And it was easy to make, because three of us could speak English. We visited before Bratislava the city Banska Bistriza, where I remembered some gays in out usual places. But I was not alone and was limited in time.

    Bratislava reminded me a little my favorite Budapest and we walked along its beautiful streets, squares and parks. Due to car we managed to approach the bridge over Danube. The Vienna and Austria were so near but it was another "capitalistic" world. Anyway I was happy to be there, because some years before it I was not permitted to have a tourist trip along Danube with visiting a few adjusting countries.

    I remembered the huge camping near Bratislava, because all the people from the quite different countries were, as I said, so kind and anticipating with us.

    But it was a time to continue our trip. We went first to Brno. I remember this city, because in Moscow in that time you could buy many different things (cloth, shoes) made in Brno. The city itself was located on some plateaus represented the huge stairway. After picking up and descending it we went to Prague. I had a friend by correspondence in Prague for many years and this nice student with glasses (I had his photos) sent me many pictures with the views of City. But I had no time to see or meet him. Prague was indeed even much better than on those pictures. The bridges over river, many trees, excellent architecture and old buildings, many shops and restaurants created its unique spirit. I thought that probably Prague was similar to Paris. Indeed after my visits to Paris I felt that Prague in some places was even better than this capital of the World.

    The impression of city from the windows of our car was so strong that when we left it with all our things and documents, I forget in this case to close the doors by key. In the beginning we walked together and I was not permitted by my ladies to taste the excellent Czech's cakes and sweats. But after our trip along the city they wanted to visit some shops. Therefore I received some time of freedom. During it I managed to visit only one toilet in subway under Vazlav Square. Our gay people overloaded it, though the entrance required payment and the gays don't like to pay at all. It was extremely clean there, i.e. it was quite different from our Russian places of such type. I understood that this city was for me and I should come here once more. By regret my dreams are kept only the dreams. It is shame on me!

    When we crossed the border in Czechia and descended from mountains in the plain Germany, I was so tired that created some threats for other cars in City Dresden. We came finally to our friends in the southeast part of Berlin. They were happy to see us alive, because we promised to come a couple days earlier, but were late, because we stayed in Czechoslovakia to increase the good impressions and to feel the friendly atmosphere. Our time with my German friends Klaus and Hanni was excellent as ever. I had in their place a possibility to visit the FKK (nudists and gay) beach near Mogelsee (Klaus showed us one of these Nudists' places, which were so popular in the former East Germany), when my ladies were tired of many impressions from Berlin museums and places.

    The region near Mogelsee became after it my favorite place in Germany and of course we visited it with Ed, when we came together in Germany. But in the time, when I was there with my family in the family of Klaus (he has a daughter and a son) I managed also to visit in free time the gay places or cruises of East Berlin, which another my German friend Gunter showed me. I made these cruises so many times, as my time and strength allowed me. And of course I visited the excellent beer bar near underground station Shonhauser Alle. It was the first gay bar, which I visited in my life. Its cozy atmosphere, the high quality service of waiters (there was one lady among them) and, first of all, the collection of good gays from all places of former GDR forced me to come there once and once more.

    Of course I had to leave this place every time soon after coming, because the Klaus house was far from it and two families were waiting for me: all foods were taken together and a quite serious procedure was used for it. I managed to come back in time in all-previous cases. But once I met a nice guy from the city Erfurt. It was so interesting to talk to him and we visited together a few time the convenient toilet of this bar for some actions. I had no strength to leave this man and was late. When I took the electric train, it was the last one in this day and its last stop was about 12 km before my place. Therefore I had to walk this way by foot on the railroad ties. The houses were adjustment to the railway lines and I was very near to the contact wire, which was laid on the height of knees. I've seen it only at the next day. Could you imagine the reaction of all the people waiting for me at home? Only one thing was good: they didn't wait for me in this case and had their food finally without me.

    After Klaus place we went in a flat of other my German friend (also Klaus), whom we visited before in Rostock. He lived now in Berlin with his second wife, and they were quite hospital for us. It was near S-bahn station "Shoneweide". In evening I could make my evening walks alone. Just near the railway (S-Bahn) station there were the thick shrubs on the railway embankment slope. I felt at once that many young boys and guy visited this place "for pissing". Indeed it was a place for gays meetings and actions.

    Before I asked my German friends: "Have you any active gays - all of you are passive?"

    They answered: "Of course, how can we be passive without active ones?"

    Here in shrubs I had a possibility to be sure in it. One man found me in the darkness between shrubs. He was gentle and polite, tried carefully to take off my cloth, put me with my ass before him, immersed accurately his extremely huge in size cock in my hole and began to act very softly. But the fire and his movement were increased gradually and reached such amplitude and strength that I moaned and cried from pleasure. Another people approached and wanted to join us. But he drove them away with some unknown for me German words. He was great, because sometimes he decelerated the process and then accelerated it prolonging our time of ecstasy as much as possible. He was polite up to the end of our marvelous action that was finally finished by my regret.

    I wanted to find this man at this place once more, but all other my visits to this place had no any result. This place was not so far from Karlhost, where our Soviet army had one of the main bases in East Germany. Therefore I had seen in this place many our Russian officers-gays. But I had only one unique experience of such type in this place.

    With my family we visited the city Halle, where we had the good friends. We met the head of family in train from Moscow to Berlin during our previous visit to Germany. He liked us and invited to visit his home. We came there by car from Berlin. They (he and his wife) gave us a nice reception. I remember only one funny thing during the breakfast: the German people broke the eggs from narrow end, while we did it from other side. Our friend as well as his wife worked in the local university and invited us to see this university and the total city. In evening he invited only me (my relatives were tired) to visit together one large party, where we drank much wine and beer. I noticed there that many men liked to kiss one another. My friend explained me that such things are usual here and I might do the same, if I wanted. He advised to try it with him (he was in addition a good painter) but I preferred to go home and to sleep. Later on I felt sorry of it.

    At the next morning we went together in mountains (Saxon Switzerland). They gave a tape-recorder for my daughter with good music and she listened to it all the way. Their car (our friend, his wife and two sons) was the first one and we followed them. I tried to drive my car and followed our friends. But in mountains at the serpentine road they managed to drive much ahead us: I had no large experience to drive on such scopes with curves. Finally already on the plain they came back and found us. After this case they tried not to leave us anymore. We visited together the palace on the mountain, where during the war there was a spy center, and also some mountains of extraordinary beauty, where the walking road circled the mountain around. Never before we had seen such inimitable beautiful landscapes, trees and railway and locomotive with wagons, which looked from a height as miniature or toys.

    The German family invited us to go together with them in Czechia, where they had the good friends. But we were afraid, because we have been already in this country and had the stamps in our passports, while the general visa or permission could be only single (if you have no special permission). We drove in Berlin through the road, which was not reconstructed or repaired after the war. Here we understood that the bad roads could be not only in Russia. But after all it was so nice to be alone in foreign country, to see their landscapes, forests and lakes with birds. Finally we reached the Neunhagen, which was a part of Berlin and where our friends Klaus and Hanni lived with their children Kerstin and Frank.

    Still in Halle I noticed, how many gays were there, especially in the underground cafe of university etc. I remembered that the producer from DEFA film, whom I met and fucked in Hungary near Balaton Lake was from Halle, and one young man, who liked the women's dress and whom I met and also fucked in Moscow, also lived in Halle. Therefore when I received a possibility to come there alone during my next visit to Germany, I came in Halle alone. Of course, as well as in the first visit I came to museum of known German-English composer Hendel. The museum was not so far from a square with the underground toilet. It was the most popular place for gays in city Halle. Just from this square the main pedestrian street of Halle, which was named a boulevard as everywhere in Germany, was begun, and many city trams crossed it.

    рыбалка I went downstairs and met in toilet not so young but quite nice and still attractive man, who invited me home. But it was not his home and the man, who wanted to have a sex with me, was his friend and the host of flat. I was astonished that the people could have so open and trustful relations between themselves. The host was younger and lived there with his family, which was not at home in that time. He suggested taking off our cloth, and three of us did it at once. They explained that the man, who invited me, would only see and masturbate. I accepted of course their conditions, because I had so limited time and I liked indeed more the host. He was perfectly passive, while I was then in so good physical state and fucked him in the different poses changing them.

    I liked finally how he laid on the back and turned his legs far behind his head. His ass was open totally and his nice and tight hole with help of their master promoted me to penetrate him on the total length of my trunk. We fulfilled together the reciprocating movements with large amplitude, and we felt that this pose was the best. The third man kissed me in my lips and helped to take the legs of his friend by his hands. With great pleasure I ejaculated deeply in the body, while both German men moaned and ejaculated too on a stomach of host. The third man rubbed the sperm by a palm of the hand and licked it.

    Just in this time we heard that the key opened the door. We managed very quickly to get dressed. His wife and daughter came, and he introduced me to them as his good friend from Prague. I spoke to them in German and in English, but I didn't tell them that I was from Russia. Frankly I didn't understand why I made it, because these two gentlemen were the people, to whom I could trust. But sometimes I liked to play some roles from not written plays as many other gays. Really it was interesting to feel yourself as a hero imagined by yourself.

    They suggested me some food and tea and we had it, as to we were the really good and old friends. Of course I was in hurry and left them soon. And after all I went again to the same square and visited the same toilet of gay meetings. I called usually such places as "the wedding palaces". I felt again that there were so many possibilities for new adventures but my train in Berlin should leave soon and I had only the time for walking once more the excellent pedestrian "boulevard" of Halle, which was in my mind the best one from all such streets-boulevards that I have seen in Germany as I mentioned above.

    With my family we visited also by means of our car (and alone) the Baltic coast near Rostock and lived a couple days in camping near the seacoast. The beach was mainly for nudists that astonished my ladies, which preferred to be in bathing suit. The nightlife in camping was so active and I've heard many times the word "Schwulen" that meant "a gay" in English. But I was in the tent with my family.

    As ever we came back again to the Klaus place in Neuenhagen, from where we went to Russia through Poland. Our German friends warned us that we could meet the bad people and relations in Poland and asked us to be very quick and attentive everywhere. The road was excellent and I drove with a speed no less that 120 km/h. Therefore we reached Warsaw quite soon. On the way we had a couple stops in the forests, where everything (especially toilets) were extremely clean and all local people were so kind with us. I don't remember, where really we stayed in Warsaw our car, but it was a paid parking. Therefore we managed to walk along some central streets and in the old Center reconstructed after War in the old style. The multistoried building - a present of Soviet Union to socialistic Poland was ugly outside and very convenient inside. In a few years after it the known gay disco was functioning in the underground space of this building. The choice of goods in Polish shops was so limited in comparison with what we have seen in Germany.

    After some time of our being in Warsaw we felt that it was a time to leave. We drove the central street and before us there was a small truck with tarpaulin close. The shoes with huge figured soles sticked out from there. We were astonished to see it and exchanged with some accusing words. In the same time a quite nice face appeared behind the soles and looked at us with the amazement. The owner of soles and face invited another two guys in the car to look at my daughter. They admired her as well as the Slovak guys near Koshice and began by hands to invite her in their car. All of us began to laugh in both cars, while their truck began to turn to the left from the central street. Three faces began to cry and the guy lifted their hand over hands asking God to help them.

    Our mood after it was good and even high, until we reached our border near Brest, after which our custom guys asked to give them some our things (wallpapers and spare parts for car), which we bought in Germany. Finally it was not bad, and in general our round trip was very successful. The last "bad" thing was my buying of two buckets of mushrooms near Minsk: I didn't know yet that the mushrooms in Belarus were especially harmful after Chernobyl accident.

    4. Two conferences in "my" Hungary

    After my first trip in Budapest I liked this beautiful city: its main Racozi Street and underground toilets, cafe-expresso's and Danube embankment with its Parliament and bridges. Just at Racozi Street I met Josepf (Joshka) and we had so nice sex in my hotel. I can't forget his words:

    "I believed that all Russian have no less that 30 cm, while your length is by 10 cm less". Anyway we had the full penetration of our bodies (their ass holes) by these not so long his and mine pricks (his length was perfectly the same as mine). After it he invited me at the concert of symphonic music with participation of our Russian conductor and introduced me to his girl friend. Joshka told me that he was in army, where he became a gay. I was in correspondence with Joshka at least for ten years after it.

    Due to my extended correspondence I found the good friend Wim in Holland. After the exchange of ideas and different points of view Wim recommended me to visit the conference that took place in the southern-east part of Hungary. Wim gave a good recommendation, and the organizers promised to support me financially (finally they permitted me not to pay any fee for participation at all). Wim also invited my daughter to study in Dutch University.

    So, my second trip in Hungary that took place 25 years after my first visit there was connected with the conference "Organization of Transformation". I met another foreign guests at one of central squares of Budapest. The city became much better for the quarter of century and even more attractive. Many modern and good buildings appeared everywhere. The traces of Russian bullets of 1955 were now totally closed, while everywhere you could meet the flowers and smart faces.

    Of coarse I recognized my foreign colleagues at once, when we moved to the place of our gathering. About 40 people from different European countries and USA came in time, and after drinking a cup of coffee all of us went with our things to the main Catholic Cathedral, near which the bus in Galosta (the Hungarian village, where the conference had to take place) had to wait us. We visited the Cathedral a few times but the bus was absent. The organizers of Budapest meeting Ton (from Holland) tried to call and to know something by telephone. Finally another organizers, which were already at the place, told him that it would be better to take the train. Ton suggested us to take taxis and to reach the railway station. I found in the group some Russian people, who were from St.Petersburg and Ekaterinburg. The foreigners paid for taxis and our tickets in Galosta. In train we had a very nice time. I had still some food from Moscow and some drinking. As nobody from foreigners could imagine such course of events, they had no any food at all. They were so glad to our Russian food and kindness. But to solve "who is who" was difficult, because indeed I paid only for my way to Budapest and back, and all other expenses for me and other Russian people were paid by them.

    Galosta was still far from a small stop of train, where we left the train, and we were met by another organizers of the event in the small building of station. I noticed the extremely pleasant, handsome and not tall guy. It was David from Holland. Just he sent me the invitation and the description of all details of conference. He was very smart in talking, and I thought how excellent it should be if he were a gay. David and other organizers suggested us the cars, which took us in the small hotel in Galosta. Finally it was a house of the former landowners in the form of Russian letter П. I received a place with the kind guy from St.Petersburg Alex.

    The intensive program of conference was begun early in the next morning. We made the special physical exercises with meditation and yoga. The goal of conference was to exchange the knowledge in optimal fulfillment of "Organization of Transformation (OT)". For us, the people from Russia, any things were perfectly new, and it was also so that the time of conference was coincided with the Putsch events in Russia. All the foreigners tried to support us and organized many special meetings and events for us and our adaptation.

    I don't want now to describe now these methods and approaches. I shall describe only some of them in the next chapter. But indeed they are so good for our gay and lesbian community. At the next year my gay friends from "Rainbow" organized a seminar in Moscow, where two gay men-psychologists from the USA told us about the same methods. They recommended for us (about 30 Russian gays and lesbians) many things, which were so similar to OT approach and allowed solving your problems with family and parents, at work and with friends, with homophobia and negative relation to you. The first condition for you is the fact that you should be very tolerant yourself. Again, I don't want now to describe all these methods, because it is possible to write about them two or three thick books. I shall concentrate on the gay side of this conference.

    Just in the first day I knew how many gays from different countries were there. First of all it was one of the main organizers of conference Nick from England. During his session Nick told us in details about OT principles and added that it could be possible to succeed in this matter, if you were honest yourself. And Nick told us really honestly about his life. He was a psychiatrist and went to the USA for working. He appeared there just in the time of AIDS peak. He had seen how many his gay friends died with suffering. He was a gay himself and he tried to develop the methods of psychological support that could help for such people to live and to survive. Frankly I was shocked by his story. Our Russian girl from Ekaterinburg Helen tried to translate Nick's story carefully in Russian. Of course she didn't knew some gay vocabulary and I gave her some advises. She was so dissatisfied with it and became very angry: a small conflict took place. But Nick helped to solve it, and we became with Helen so good friends forever since then and translated all the sessions together in turn (we were the only Russians from 8 our participants, who could understand and translate English).

    Nick told me about other gay participants of conference. And really David was a gay and he had his boy friend Dan from Holland nearby. Both of them were very intelligent and had the extremely rich knowledge about the subject. Next morning I visited the morning exercises that were organized by both of them. It was so that the pants of David's friend Dan were wet near the ass hole. I understood at once that it was the result of their night love. But they didn't even conceal it. The Dutchman Ton was also gay and he had the brother Coen - the second main organizer of event after David. Coen was also open gay and their parents being at the conference confirmed it. But I wrote about it, when I told about gay conference in Moscow organized by Vlad Ortanov, where I came with Ton, who had his presentation. Among other gays I want to mention the Englishman (better to say - Irishman) Patrick.

    During the conference we had many cases, when we had to prove our unity and we stood together hugging one to another independently on the fact you were man or woman, gay or straight, lesbian or of other nationality. I liked to find and to hug this Patrick. When I came home, and the friend of my daughter Alla presented me the white kitten with dark head and tail, I gave him, of course, the name Patrick: I couldn't forget our hugging.

    What was my reaction on the gays of Conference? In that time I never before met the gays from abroad and, as we spoke in that time, for the capitalistic countries (with the exception of English painter at the exhibition). It was so interesting for me to observe their cloth, manner of behavior and speaking. I had to tell frankly that in that time I didn't find any differences between them and the straight people presenting at the same Conference. Of course for me they were better than others were, because they were the same as me in my sexual preferences. In the same time they were very educated, intelligent, kind and open, had a sense of humor and a very wide knowledge of subjects and life in general. And all of them were especially kind to me, when they knew that I was a gay too.

    As to me I investigated or examined attentively, for example, the dress that Nick used. I found that both of us had practically the same brown shorts and checked shirts. Once, when I get dressed the shirt of golden fiber with an unusual sewing, Nick told me some compliments and made my photo, which I carefully kept. I understood that the gays from other countries looked at me and my behavior also with interest and unconcealed sympathy. I reminded them joking the Marx's word: "Proletarians of all countries, unite!", where the word proletarian was expedient to substitute by GAYS. Really, how great at the conference was to feel, that there was in the world such excellent unification as the gay community!

    Nick and I became the very good friends. He suggested me to translate his book "Healing within yourself" in Russian and invited me to visit him in England. I felt the good friendly relation to me from the mentioned Dutch family for all these years and at another OT conference in England two years later. If I described already my visit to Nick above, here I want to add some words about this second OT conference. Nick in that time was practically in the last stage of his AIDS. But he tried to keep himself properly. His own approach helped him to survive at least some extra years in comparison with usual gay suffered of AIDS. I can recommend to everybody to read his book.

    At the conference in Gaunts House, which was located in the Southern part of England, they invited some people from Asia, and of course there ware many people from England and Sweden. They heard my information about positive changes in Russia with interest. And anyway our Russia stayed for them the mysterious country and so not understandable features. What is also true, that the Russian people couldn't understand sometimes themselves and their own behavior. Coen came in Gaints House with his German boy friend, and they were so inseparable and reliable gay couple. I liked to se how they, totally naked and with large long pricks, were swimming in the open and quite cold swimming pool. They wrote a book and usefulness of urinotherapy and I remembered some advises that my father-doctor gave me. They developed and deepened this old approach. Of coarse, I was glad to see my old and new friend in England. But it was my last meeting on this Earth with my extraordinary friend Nick Bamforth and I remembered this OT conference, first of all, due to it.

    Now I want to remember my third trip in Hungary with my Ed. Helen from Ekaterinburg helped me to install contacts with the organizers of "European men's gathering". I was permitted to go there with Ed, who was my boy friend already for two years. It was really the happiness of being together that I never had before. I am in envy to the modern gays in the world and in Russia too: many of them have now this possibility to be openly with their boy friends. For us before it was impossible, and it was impossible not to do it, but even to imagine it.

    Ed and I took the tent with us and came in Budapest a couple days earlier than the conference took place. We found quickly the camping, where the most part of people came mainly by cars from the total Europe. But we met also some Austrian people who came there by bicycles. Many open swimming pools and the special place for sunny burning and rest were located on the other side of road from the camping. Ed and I remembered one very nice girl with excellent figure, which laid there and had the large colorful tattooing on her left thigh. How proud she was to show this her sign!

    I was always jealous, because I was afraid that somebody could "steal" my young Ed (finally he was stolen but many years later). Some people in surrounding tents were also gays, and I contacted and spoke to them with a great pleasure. In this case Ed was very jealous, and it was forbidden by HIM to continue these contacts. At least he managed to take me away in such cases at once. Anyway we became friends with the nice Italian couple and Dutch family, whose cars stood near our tent. We found some Hungarian people, who were also the organizers of conference, which took place in small western Hungarian City near the border with Austria. They helped us to reach this place in their car.

    There were many gays among the participants of "Men's' gathering of Europe", as we gradually understood. In some degree the conference in its idea was very similar to OT, but it concerned only the men. The men from South America and some other parts of the world (not only from Europe) presented at the conference, though it had a name of "European". All foreign participants supported us - four Russians and paid for all our being at conference. Among gays of conference there were many Germans, though there were also the gays from Romania, Slovak, Brazil and Hungary itself. One old German man was, for example, with his lover from Romania but they lived separately. Finally we were the only real couple at all conference. And we were afraid that somebody could hear the sounds of our intensive night exercises in bed (we slept most time at one bed though each of us - Ed and me had his own bed).

    Once the organizers said that they couldn't pay for us, because the prices were higher than they waited for. I said that in such case we would leave earlier or at once. Nobody wanted to have some bad events, and the German friends managed to collect the necessary money. Two other Russian participants were practically fascists in the their viewpoints, and it was so difficult for me not to say what I was thinking of them. Ed asked me not to spoil our time, though he was agree with me in principle. I remember well the session of conference, when the German participants asked the other people to forgive them for the grief and damage, which the Germans and fascists caused to other people in the world especially to my Russia.

    I thought in this time how far in Russia we are from such real repentance: our Communism and the totalitarian system spoilt the lives and fates of many our men and women, killed the millions of our people of different nationalities and nobody yet suffered for these crimes seriously (probably only the former KGB chief Beriya). Of course the crimes of fascists were especially terrible. Anyway the crimes are finally the crimes. At least in Hungary I've seen how the German participants stood on knees before one Hungarian man, who was half-Jew, and asked him to forgive them. It was so that another two Russian participants laughed in this time and told one to another the funny stories about Jews. That is sometimes our Russian people and our reality!

    Finally a time at the conference together with Ed was over, and a few free days before leaving we carried out in the same camping of Budapest. I remembered this period as a time of happiness and full mutual understanding, though we had of course in that time some small conflicts and misunderstandings typical for the total people. We both were excited of Budapest, its folk, streets and excellent architecture.

    In the train to Russia I met a guy, whom I fucked in his tight ass hole before for the time of two years and who was a chief of trains going in Hungary. We had only friendly talking, because I was in other dimensions (I was with Ed), while he was at work and carried a high responsibility.

    As to the friends from Men's Conference in Hungary, some of them visited us in Moscow. Three German participants (two of them were gays) preferred to live in my home. Ed and I showed them Moscow with pleasure. But the Russian organizers of Moscow conference (including two strange guys being in Hungary) had only one goal - to gain money by anyway, and they spoiled many things. I had a premonition about such things, because I understood those two Russians still in Hungary.

    When our German friends understood everything themselves in Moscow and felt that I knew some facts already in Hungary, they accused me in some dishonesty: they believed that I should tell them about these people before. But how I could explain them that I followed the recommendations of Ed than the real logic and my own estimates. I was surely wrong: in any case you mustn't contradict with your own deep principles and ideas. It was really my mistake and I agreed with my German friends. I was so nervous after it that I forget to switch off the lamp in my small storeroom, where I kept the extra cushions and other things. It was finally a great fire inside, and everything in this room was burned down. I was lucky that in that time my German friends were still at home (I went to work) and managed to extinguish the fire themselves. Therefore I was partially punished. As my German friends told me finally, their time in my place, the trips with Ed and me around Moscow and along Moskva river were the best moments of their being in Russia for conference.

    5. What is bothering ABC?

    How often being in trips to other countries I was not satisfied with something that irritated me with its deliberates, re-iteration and was persistently imposed on me. For me it was mainly connected with the absence of gay places (as for example at the coast of Romania) or some other inconveniences. My friend from Australia, with whom I was in correspondence for some years gave a very good determination of it. But I want to begin from the beginning. Christopher (or Chris) wanted eagerly to visit Moscow and to meet me, because as we could understand from our letters, we were the very congenial souls.

    Finally Chris found a convenient travel tour with visiting Moscow. It was a round tour by bus from Berlin via Warsaw, Moscow, Saint Petersburg, Helsinki, Stockholm and Copenhagen and back to Berlin with a group of tourists from the different countries. He wrote me beforehand about his schedule and I knew it and waited for his call. He rang me up and I went to him.

    Our first meeting took place near the hotel "Russia", where the bus of Chris's group had parking and all tourists had the suites. Our meeting was of course extremely heartily and frank from its beginning. I invited him to Bolshoi Theater, where there was a daytime concert with performing the things written by composer David Krivitsky, who was my good friend for many years.

    On the way there I invited Chris to visit one Orthodox Church, which was recently opened after many years of its usage as a storehouse. The outside church restoration was only finished, I've never been inside myself and it was interesting for me to see it. From a court we ascended by stairs on the second floor of Cathedral, which astonished me with its huge sizes and the restored wall paintings and icons. The church service took place, and I was glad that I managed to show it to Chris. The singing of chorus was excellent, and I felt it as the preparation to the concert of very serious music of my friend David. After leaving the Church I asked Chris how he liked it. He answered:

    "O'K, it was usual ABC".

    I didn't understand what it meant and hoped that ABC was similar to O'K or continued its meaning, and we were in hurry not to be late at concert.

    David was glad to see a man and musician (Chris is a teacher of music for piano) from so far Australia and asked Chris in the interval of concert about his opinion about music. I was glad that I could translate the very professional answers of Chris. The concert took place in the small concert hall of Bolshoi and when the attendants of Bolshoi incidentally knew that Chris was a musician from a far land, they showed him all inside facilities of theater and scene. Chris was pleased and after the concert and saying many compliments to David, we went again to the hotel, because Chris wanted to have something accordingly to the group's program.

    On the way I asked Chris what was finally his ABC, and Chris told me sincerely that it meant Another Bloody Church, or Another Bloody Cathedral. He explained in their trip it was so also connected with their guide - a lady, who met a Chris group at the Russian border. All the time she tried to fulfill the "necessary" program without deviating from it and showed them a great number of churches on their way. Any requests to deviate from "the program" (obligatory, in her mind) couldn't shake "thick ass", as I called this guide proceeding of the size of her sitting place.

    The life is so many - sided, and the religion and church are only a part of it. The tourists "surfeited" with one-sided information began to transform their dissatisfaction in the humor (ABC) and the mockeries over "thick ass" but she didn't feel these banters. Finally they had to follow her routine program. Chris decided to leave his group for a couple days, when they left for St. Petersburg and to stay in my place. Finally he caught up with them in St.Petersburg. If to be frank, this "thick ass" was kind to him and didn't have any objections, when he informed her that he wanted to change a little his program and to linger in Moscow in my place. Fortunately I managed to show to Chris in this short time another interesting places of Moscow and what was important (or bad) - to acquaint him with my boy friend Ed that was very pleasant for both of them (to some my displeasure). The short time of Chris with us was finally friendly and very substantial, about those Chris had wrote me later on, and he sends now his special greetings to Ed.

    This ABC itself is held up in my head, though my American friend Peter called it as bad English of stupid Australians. Anyway how often I met ABC during my being in other countries. As to Russia, after the perestroika and the collapse of communism the Russian Orthodox Church became a symbol of our revival and in some degree a symbol not only of faith but also of all Russia as well as it was before Bolsheviks during the centuries. But finally it becomes ABC, if to present the total modern Russia only by means of the church. Probably it is important for us, if to take into account how many gays are among the priests, but it is only a joke.

    Now I want to remember in this connection my visit to San Francisco (SF), where my friends from the group of square-dances (I was their guide in Moscow) divided my time in this marvelous city in five parts (by 2-3 days) trying to show me the most interesting things. Each of them wanted to tell and show me some special features of their city. One of the friends - Roger was a worshipper of scientific fictions and star wars. For three days Roger told me only about such books and films not taking into account my interests.

    Together with some other gays Roger was living on the hill over gay Castro district in the house devoted to the elderly woman. It was so that this lady was hidden for some days after one recent earthquake in her house, and nobody remembered or helped her. She left without a trace her house and this city, which is subject to such natural calamities, and she rented her house to Roger and some other gays. As to earthquake in SF there is at the Fisherman embankment of city the special unusual museum, where in a special chairs you could feel all the horrors of earthquake, fire and city destruction that took place in 20th of XX century. Now the new gay tenants transferred the house in the collection of scientific fiction books and the films on star wars, which became for me also ABC (Another Bloody Cinema).

    Finally in spite of "the attack" of such information, from all, that I had seen in Roger's house I remembered only, that one from the gays living with him in the same house had a bad snotty nose (as me and for some reasons connected with sucking - many other gays). However he underwent a cure and had to be operated (on nose). I should note also for the sake of justice that in addition to scientific fictions there were some other books and tapes with films in their house.

    Roger showed me in SF the Russian Orthodox Church and the huge synagogue - a real museum located not so far one from another. It was really interesting. However the volley of information on star wars seemed to be for me the new ABC, though I couldn't then determined it accurately (in this short three letters ABC).

    I visit often (with business trips) my favorite Copenhagen, and all my Danish friends tried always to show me the poor mermaid (her head was twice cut and restored) and the park "Tivoli". They showed me this Tivoli even in Christmas days, when it looked, softly speaking, as not presentable. Anytime I had a feeling, that they had in the city nothing worth seeing: no dozens interesting museums, water channels, their old town - huge museum under open sky and many other things including tens gay places, saunas, cafes and library. Finally the sweet heart mermaid created by the imagination of Great Andersen (the monument to him is standing between the town hall and Shovel), and the really fairy-tale fantastic Tivoli became for me the notorious ABC (Another Bloody Cage).

    In London I was stricken by the high cost of ticket in many museums: they were murderous. I was in a group of Moscow ice-dance club visiting with a return visit the English figure skaters from the similar Oxford club. They organized the special trip and sightseeing in London but we couldn't visit Tower and some other museums due to the high cost of tickets. This was another ABC - Another Bloody Costs.

    In Paris I have been three years before the just mentioned visit to Oxford with the similar group of ice-dancers (I like to dance on ice). Paris figure-skating club invited us. The French dancers visited us before it in Moscow that was done due to support of the so handsome and kind world champion Andrei Minenkov. In Paris we were irritated by a large number of hoboes or bomzhes in Russian (the people without a certain place of living and existence), which were ABHB (another blooding hobo-bomzh - the first deviation from ABC). Everywhere in city especially near Metro stations we met these ABHB.

    "See, Vova (my short name), it is not well being here too - they have also bomzhes", - joked a girl from our group Dasha, who after a couple years went forever in France.

    She continued to joke: "It would be necessary for my "report" for KGB".

    But in that time such reports were already unnecessary. This ABHB persuaded me every time, when I was after it in Paris with business trips and worked there. I noticed also, that the enough number of gays walked along Paris streets (in a certain region of city) especially in the late evening time. But I've never been alone in Paris, though the ABG (Another Bloody Gay - the second deviation from ABC in the case, if Gay means a deviation for somebody) was always in my mind - they were always beyond my means there.

    In Basel (Switzerland) the friends invited me to the gay-disco, where before the dances there was a performance of young singer - Diva from Germany (now we have in Russia the similar Diva with a name Shura, and ABD is Another Bloody Diva, or the third nice deviation). I was delighted with his (or her) singing of women schlagers of the 20th of XX century. After the concert the dances were begun, and therefore everything was so good for me (the dances at gay discos are my hobby and enjoyment). Anyway gradually all the hall was filled with cigarette smoke so typical for all gay discos (from my childhood I was surrounded by a smoke from cigarettes of my parents-doctors, and I hated this smog). I call this smog as ABC (Another Bloody Covering).

    After all, at this Basel disco, where I met so many excellent gays from Switzerland, France and Germany simultaneously, two my friends began to elucidate their relations, the third guy rival in love approached and the cackle that was so ordinary among gays was begun (another ABC - Another Bloody Cackle). In my relations with Ed such ABC was recently also begun. What is it? For me now this ABC means Another Bloody Crying.

    And now, in conclusion, I want to remind something different. In the Soviet time we used here addressing to somebody "Comrade" instead of Mister, Sir or Gentlemen (in Russian - Gospodin). Now when more and more such people from the former times appear in our Russian radio and I see them on TV screen, I say about them - ABC (Another Bloody Comrades). In such way, Chris dotted my "is" and cross my "T's" (really he singled out with heavy (bold) line the different C). Have you your own ABC? Are they good or bad? On the whole they are so boring or bothering. Do they spoil your trips and impressions? Don't draw your attention to them!

    Vladimir Kabakov

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